Ectopic Pregnancy after IVF

[els]

Hi all, I've never wrote a post before in a blog but I feel I've been sneaking around taking fears and hope from other people stories for the last few years so it seems the right time now to share our experience.

My husband and I got married three years ago and started trying for a family soon after. I have PCOS (although I am petite.. so already very unlucky) so I knew it may take longer than normal, everyone told me that lean PCOS is difficult to treat.. two years later after acupuncture, 6 months on Clomyd, ongoing Metformin intake, healthy dieting and loads of yoga.. we were still hoping for a wild card: IVF.

In Feb 15 we started the injections, it was quite tough on my body but we both felt positive, even if the chance of working was 1 in 3 at least the process may 'wake up' my body. We had few friends that went through it and even when they had a negative results, they conceived naturally straight after, so we we were hopeful.. we laughed throughout the process and everyone was impressed how calm and positive we were, this was going to work. So on the day that the clinic told us to do a pregnancy test we were sad seeing a negative result but we said, right it is going to work next time (we have 3 frozen embryos at the clinic). Two days later still no bleeding, so we retook the test.. and it was positive. I think after so long having my hubby coming in the kitchen and say 'sweetie we are having a baby' was one of the happiest moments of my life. I've always read the results myself and as they were all negative, I thought this time I'd make him wait around alone. We couldn't believe it was happening to us.. how so naive we were!
Although we tried not to dream, not to hope for an Autumn bundle of joy.. we did hope and we did dream.. until i've started having a dull ache on my left side and the scan did not detect anything in the womb. Many tests and false hope of a miscarriage later (yes even miscarriage seemed a better option).. the most awful news we could have after the IVF is an ectopic pregnancy.
I still cannot believe an ectopic pregnancy can happen in the IVF when they put it right in your uterus and it is such a rare thing.. especially as i didn't have any other factors that could make this happen.
So now we are on expectant management, but it is awful.. i have horrendous pains going to the washroom and ultimately i am fearing for a surgery.. to bring us back to the start of the conception process with yet another problem to increase our infertility.
I simply cannot believe how unlucky we have to be, like there is no one up there looking on us and thinking that surely those years of pain were not enough, now we have to deal with this.
I am getting older year after year, a lot of our friends had babies, now they are having brothers and sisters and here we are in a very dark place with little hope to succeed. What are our other choices? More IVFs? More Ectopic? Or going to adopt.. but even that is scary, after this I am not sure I have the strenght to go through the long wait of adoption and the awareness that most of the available children have huge problems both health and mentally.

Sorry for the long stream of thoughts, I just feel so lost, so alone and with a mountain in front of me with nothing to help me climbing.

xx

[Whitedaisy]

Hi
I'm so sorry you are going through all this. I had an EP in Nov, 2014 and know how emotionally painful it can be.

How far along is your pregnancy? How large is the fetus? Just a word of caution....I too was afraid of surgery for my EP and was in denial about the possibility of my tube rupturing. I chose to take the methotrexate shot to chemically treat the EP and better preserve my fertility. Bad choice....I got burned and ultimately lost the tube. So please be careful. Unless your EP has been caught very early, please consider having surgery to remove the ectopic. Good luck to you.

[els]

Thanks for your message, it is just a nightmare.

I was 5 weeks when the synthoms started and my HCG has never been more than 520 and since last Saturday is now down to 220 a week after, it is just going down so slowly though and I am dreading going to the loo in case it ruptures. The mass last Thursday was 2cm x 1.5cm. The doctor seemed confident expectant management would work but I always seem to fall in th unlucky small %.

I just want to wake up from this nightmare and go back living.

Xx

[Lucy9876]

Hi,

Just thought I would share my journey with you as after my ectopic last august I struggled to find anyone talking about having an ectopic after ivf. I did. It's so hard as you go through so much and then for it all to end so abruptly is awful. And it's just not what you expect when having ivf. I had to have surgery as my right tube had ruptured. I have had another 2 ivf transfers since but they have been unsuccessful (however I have very difficult transfers so I believe it's down to that). But, I wanted you know that you can do it again, this journey will just make to stronger and more determined to succeed in getting pregnant. Also, I like to look at the positive of that your body managed to get pregnant! Hope your ok and take it easy, you are going through a lot.

[angiesmcs]

Hi

I am very sorry to read your story....and yes it does see very cruel.
I had an ectopic pregnancy in febuary after trying to get pregnant for over 10 years. I have my right tube removed and have now being told my only chance is IVF because my left tube is blocked. I am British but live in sweden and the clinic have told me i have to have my left tube removed before they proceed....obviously they don't want take any risks. If i don't get pregnant through ivf i don't know what I'll do, I'm 37 so time isn't on my side.
Goodluck and keep us posted on how you get on.Xx

[els]

Thanks so much for your messages. I didn t reply earlier as.. I was rushed to surgery after they have seen internal bleeding on Monday. Although my levels were falling steadily, the mass was still very much there and they had to remove my left tube.

They also found some endemetriosis on my uterus, so it seems between this, PCOS and now only one tubes our dreams of a family is unachieavable. I know we can do IVF but look where it took us..

In the hospital in front of me there is a girl 8 weeks pregnant, she is very unwell and vomiting all the time. She is exactly far along i would be, i cannot bring myself to ask her anything.. I am just so jealous, i'd vomit 9months straight. I almost considered not eating so i would not pass stolls and my ectopic would not rupture, but it was too late anyway.

Xx

[angiesmcs]

I'm so sorry this has happened to you.

You got pregnant so you can again. Don't give up hope!

Ang Xx

[els]

Hi,

Just thought I would share my journey with you as after my ectopic last august I struggled to find anyone talking about having an ectopic after ivf. I did. It's so hard as you go through so much and then for it all to end so abruptly is awful. And it's just not what you expect when having ivf. I had to have surgery as my right tube had ruptured. I have had another 2 ivf transfers since but they have been unsuccessful (however I have very difficult transfers so I believe it's down to that). But, I wanted you know that you can do it again, this journey will just make to stronger and more determined to succeed in getting pregnant. Also, I like to look at the positive of that your body managed to get pregnant! Hope your ok and take it easy, you are going through a lot.

Thanks Lucy, i too had a tricky transfer.. They said that I had a convulted cervix and struggled to put in the canula, after that all was ok but I still wonder if they push the little one too high or too hard. Is this what you experienced too?

Thanks so much for sharing your experience, we have three frozen embryos at the clinic but still scare to consider a second run.

Xxx

[Lucy9876]

Yes that's exactly what I think happened during transfer causing the ectopic. Although the dr said not! I am currently injecting for another fet now and this time I having a 3D internal scan at the same time as the catheter going in so they can navigate my cervix better and also make sure they place it in exactly the right spot! Hoping this makes for a more successful transfer. I have also had a 'mock' transfer and they have drawn a diagram in my notes to guide the next person doing the transfer. Maybe you could ask for some of those on your next transfer? Hope your feeling ok, be kind to yourself and give yourself time before going for your next ivf. I regretted having the next cycle 2 months after the ectoptic as looking back my body was not ready but my mind really wanted to push ahead with it! (It failed).

[els]

Thanks Lucy, we will definitely ask for those as I am convinced that this is what happened.. Maybe it is only me trying to find a reason for all this maddness but i will ask for those things to the clinic to give us the best chance.. Although frozen embryos have a bit lower success rates, we hope one of the 3 we got will work. Otherwise we will try again a fresh cycle, I just want to try and be positive.. my gyno at the hospital kept reminding me that we need to believe it.

I think we will wait until July, this should give us 3 full months at least, but we will see as we may not be ready for that either. It has been such a trauma..

Thanks so much for sharing your experience, it has been so comforting to hear your story and the strenght you showed in moving on. I wish you the best of luck for this cycle and will be thinking of you in those difficult next weeks. Everything crossed that this is your turn for this long awaited dream to realise!

Xxx

[somayb3bab3]

Hello, just thought I'd jump on board with my own story too. Just had my first cycle of ICSI at ARGC, which resulted in an ectopic pregnancy which was removed along with my right tube during an emergency laparoscopy. What are the odds?

That was less than a week ago, and I'm recovering very well, actually. I was afraid the healing time would be more like 2 weeks, but I'm only about 4 days in and I'm already feeling pretty mobile and normal. Sometimes I get overwhelmed by negativity about never being able to have a child and feeling like such a loser compared to all my other friends who are either already moms or are currently pregnant.

But then at other times I think, this could have been so much worse. Like I could have opted for the MTX injection and it might not have worked and had to have a second one, and that would have put us out of any IVF action for the next 6 months. Whereas now after the surgery, it's considered resolved and my body is free from any chemotherapy drugs, and we're free to start trying again as soon as my cycle regulates itself.

Or the whole A&E experience could have been so much worse with an actual rupture, rather than what I felt was a very stable, managed tubal miscarriage. My experience was altogether a very positive one, with great doctors and nurses who were very warm and human, and an operation that felt safe from start to finish.

And of course, there's always the fact that we actually did manage to get pregnant, which is the first time ever in all my 37 years, so surely that must be a good thing!