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Disappointed with Ectopic care
Disappointed with Ectopic care
She went up to the hospital who wouldn't scan her because again they didn't think it was an ectopic as she 'wasn't in enough pain.' She demanded a scan the following day, and they took bloods that night and she went home. Her blood pressure and pulse were a bit high they said but sent her home anyway. Next day they scanned her and there was the ectopic left tube and they gave her the shot of MTX.
What concerns me is that back when i had mine there was very little literature on ectopics, no facebook support groups, hardly any info, apart from the Miscarriage association's wonderful helpline, on which i volunteered for some time. Nowadays however awareness is very high, even soaps have had ectopic story-lines, I honestly though doctors were more clued up, more aware these days, that a woman presenting with a pregnancy and one sided pains, severe or not, should be treated as a suspected ectopic.
If it wasn't for me insisting that she persevere to get a scan and bloods, and her trusting me to know what i was on about she might have accepted the first diagnosis and not gone to the hospital, and suffered a rupture with all the medical emergency that surrounds one. I was left disappointed with her care, and stunned that with some doctors at least, the awareness just isn't there, despite the brilliant work people like the EPT do.
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Re: Disappointed with Ectopic care
Hope your daughter is ok and sorry for her loss X
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Re: Disappointed with Ectopic care
Re: Disappointed with Ectopic care
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Re: Disappointed with Ectopic care
When did your trauma mostly fade away? In time or with some milestone? Does your daughter's experience bring back a bit of yours or not? My recent loss is fresh, but even so the emotional recovery takes longer than I expect or want. I'm three months out from my last blood draw but still here, not moving on yet... in time I suppose.
Hugs for your family.
Re: Disappointed with Ectopic care
Thanks for sharing this story. I had an ectopic last September (firs pregnancy). I was about 7 weeks when I went to the doctor with my partner to have the first check up and register at the hospital. I told the doctor that I had spotting (at the time I had very little pain which I assumed was normal for pregnancy). He dismissed the spotting as normal pregnancy thing and said he would organise for me to have a scane at 12 weeks (!) apparently the norm here... A couple days later, the pain increased, I went to hospital again, but was put to a midwife, she said the same thing your daughter was told: I was not in agony so I was fine and she said no to scanning me. A week later a fainted, my partner barely got me to hospital, I got operated on within an hour and barely survived with internal bleeding.
So you see there is no more awareness - I personally only read quickly on it (I did not know how common it is, and did not realise its gravity and potential death if untreated - I know now!).
I have told myself that now I am stronger and my head and heart have cleared up that I will help with raising awareness. Do it too, your daughter would have had much more trauma (like me) or could have died if you had not already been aware (I had noone like that around me). May be your local newspaper would be interested in your story, and raising awareness? Local radio? Put something on facebook etc.
As you, I am shocked at how little ecotpic seems to be known, in particular in the medical/midwives sphere (I heard it once in a series on TV I think and it only said she lost the baby - nothing about life-threatening or anything). Every woman, especially if she already knows she is pregnant, presenting with bleeding and pain, particular one-sided should be scanned to rule out ectopic. Point blank. This is life saving and should be a common practice everywhere. Ambulance staff also needs to know about ectopic.
Thanks for sharing, and let's raise awarness! As you said in this age of communication, it's incredible. Even pregnancy help books barely mention ectopic, if at all!
Re: Disappointed with Ectopic care
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Re: Disappointed with Ectopic care
I am so sorry to hear of your and your daughter's ectopic pregnancies and losses. While many health care professionals provide excellent levels of care, sadly we do sometimes come across instances where the care is not as we would expect. I'm sorry that you, your daughter and your family have had to go through this. You are absolutely right that sometimes the awareness isn't there and we do strive to address this. Thank you very much for your kind words of support and you have our word that we will continue to work hard to bring attention to the condition among the public and healthcare professionals alike.
In terms of your daughter's circumstances, you may be aware that you can raise your thoughts via the Patient Advice and Liaison Service or PALS. You can find your local PALS here and it may be an avenue which can help:
http://www.nhs.uk/Service-Search/Patien ... Search/363
Please do feel free to continue to use your boards to express yourself and you could also let your daughter know if that may help. We will support you both during this difficult time as best we can.
With good wishes,
Michele
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If we have been able to help you, are you able to help us with a small donation or by volunteering?
Further information is available at http://www.ectopic.org.uk
Email us at ept@ectopic.org.uk.
Our helpline is 020 7733 2653 (available Monday to Friday 10am - 4pm).
Detailed medical information can be found on our website. Please remember online medical information is NO SUBSTITUTE for expert medical advice from your own health care team.
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Re: Disappointed with Ectopic care
By friday night, I was still bleeding and essentially had a 'miscarriage'. I was very ill with it and I knew what it was as a friend had described her own to me. As the night went on my partner, increasingly afraid, called NHS 24 for advice. They told us to get to A&E. I asked them to send an ambulance as my husband couldn't leave the kids on their own in the house. They asked, could I not get a taxi? At this point, I could barely stand. And that is typical of the ridiculous way we were treated.
Finally my husband managed to find a neighbour awake at 4am to come stay with our (his) kids so we could drive to the hospital. On getting there, I told everyone who would listen that the pregnancy was ectopic. It is a very clear feeling. Yet again I was ignored and they discharged be and told me to ignore the bleeding.
Luckily for me, the scan was the next morning, at which point they 'informed' me that the pregnancy was ectopic. By the time I was operated on, apparently I was in some danger. The operation was never properly explained to me. My husband was told while I was in surgery that I may die and then left alone in the corridor. The care I received in the hospital was appalling. They would not allow my husband to come and see me even though I was in an empty ward all night alone. They made him sit alone in the waiting room downstairs while I lay alone upstairs. I can't believe how bad they were. We were discharged with no help or telephone numbers or advice.
After a few weeks I went back to my GP, told them about the rage and depression, and asked for counselling. I was told there is no provision and there's nothing they can offer me.
People are far too quick to write off my anger as being because the baby died. I am not angry about that. I am sad, but it's just an unlucky thing you know? But the things I am really furious about is how no-one listened to me, and if I had followed their advice I would be dead now. I can't believe there is no follow up help available. I have asked my GP for a follow up appointment with a specialist so I can understand what happened in the operation, and what the implications are for my husband and I going forward. Apparently I cant have this either.
From the moment I fell pregnant, every medical practitioner I talked to assumed I was crazy and hysterical. I lost count of the number of times they patronisingly 'patted my arm' and reassured me that pregnant ladies get these worries but there's nothing to worry about, as though I became deranged when I fell pregnant. I am afraid now to take any help from them. My husband wants me to go back and speak to them again but I don't trust them at all. I want to complain to the GMC but the process is too hard.
I wish my mother had been able to help me the way you have helped your daughter. I think the fact that you are here at all is very positive. And I am sick of being told I am too angry! I paid (until I lost my job, again after this all happened) my taxes every month and I was told they were spent on the NHS to help people when they are sick. It seems, not women. We are written off as crazy. We are not offered counselling, we're told to drug ourselves and stop crying. I am furious. And what does this mean for my future? Since then, I thought I was pregnant again (false alarm) and my husband told me to go to the doctor. I said I would not and I would not go to hospital to have my baby either. I feel safer having it alone on the living room floor. How do I get over that and move forward? And how dare they blame my anger on the child's death? I am angry at THEM.
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Re: Disappointed with Ectopic care
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