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When is the pain going to stop?

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CharlotteEmilyx
Posts: 1
Joined: Tue Dec 13, 2016 7:57 pm

When is the pain going to stop?

Post by CharlotteEmilyx »

I'd like to share my story as I'm struggling to
Come to terms with everything that's happened. Hoping for some advice.

I found out I was pregnant on the 18th November, I was shocked as I'm only 20 years old and I had been taking my pill. I told my boyfriend and our family's and everyone was happy for us. I'd come round to the idea and I was so excited.

I'd worked out I was about 4 weeks pregnant, so booked in for a doctors appointment.
The morning of my doctors appointment I started spotting (I'd read this was completely normal) I didn't think anything of it. My doctors confirmed pregnancy and told me if the bleeding hadn't stopped to come back in a weeks time.

A few days later the bleeding got a lot worse more like a brown discharge colour and I'd started getting stomach cramps (more towards my right hand side ) so I took myself to A&E where they transferred me to the EPU.
The doctor did an examination of me and said everything looked normal and it could have been old blood. But booked me in for a scan on the Tuesday morning.

Monday afternoon came round and I suddenly fell to the floor in agony, the pain was just unbearable. I couldn't walk i was shaking, I felt sick, I was bleeding a lot heavier. I'd never felt a pain quite like it, and this point I knew something had happened to our baby.
We rang the EPU unit and they told us to get to them ASAP. When I arrived the pains had calmed down and I felt a lot better! The doctor examined me again, told me to rest and come back for my scan in the morning.

Tuesday morning came by (scan day)
In my head already I knew there was going to be a problem. She was scanning me which felt like forever the pain was unbearable, (more to my right side ). She told us she could see a shadow on my right hand side and she would get a doctor in to speak to me ASAP. There was no baby. My heart broke in to a million pieces, how could you love something so much that you never really had?

All day I was prodded, poked, I didn't even care. The pain of been told is lost my baby over run any physical pain.
The doctor explained to me he thought I'd was an ectopic pregnancy, he had my blood results which confirmed this.
He explained to about the methotrexate injection, which I was happy to have. I was to come back on the Wednesday (next day) to have this done.
That night my pains came back but this time they were a lot worse. I was rushed to A&E again where they kept me overnight on the EPU ward.
I had my injection on Wednesday as planed,
they wanted to keep me in to monitor the pain. The early hours on Thursday morning I woke up in hospital again with this unbearable pain. That's when the nurses/doctors decided I was having surgery that day.
From 5am I was been sick, feeling faint, the pain seemed to be getting worse and worse. At 10am I finally was taken for the surgery.
They managed to do it keyhole but had to remove my Fallopian tube. They explained what they had seen on the scan had tripled in size, and they'd found a lot of blood in my pelvis area.
If I had been left a few more days I would have died.
Now nearly a week on, my physical pain is ok.
But my mental pain I worry for. I go back to work on Monday and I'm scared I'm not going to be able to handle all the questions.

My boyfriends and family have been amazing.
But I'm scared for the future, for when we are ready to try for a baby again. What will happen?

Charlotte xxx

Lauren-x
Posts: 9
Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2016 9:44 pm

Re: When is the pain going to stop?

Post by Lauren-x »

Hi Charlotte,

I've been through the very same thing as you just last week and I'm just 21. It's so so difficult. I had no pains at all just a little bit of cramping but no bleeding, I thought everything was perfect. I went to the doctors and she was skeptical and wanted me to go have a early pregnancy scan just to be safe, she thought I might of been a week or two weeks pregnant, I went for the scan the following day and like you there was no baby but a rather big mass in my right fallopian tube. Because I was in no pain they kept me in but sent me home the following day to come back the next day for more bloods, my hormones doubled and they were so high I could only have the option of surgery, so I went just had it done Saturday gone. Scariest experience of my life. My heart is absolutely broken and I know exactly how you feel, I look at other mothers and I keep asking myself "why could they have a baby and I couldn't?" I keep telling myself I'm fine but I'm not, I am terrified too. Scared that it'll happen again, many women go on to have perfectly happy pregnancies after ectopics and with only one tube and I know that but I also know how you feel and that feeling of fear of the unknown.

I said to my partner last night "I wish I could go to a fortune teller and know that my next pregnancy would be perfect " I'm so nervous that like this pregnancy I'd have no symptoms no pain, no bleeding and I'll be six weeks pregnant again and no baby just another ectopic and my other tube will have to be removed.

I also know that all these feelings are normal and they are a part of the healing process and if you need to cry then cry, and if you need to scream then scream and if you want to tell people, tell them. You are under no obligation to let people know what's happened but to be honest I am finding it's easier people know what I'm going through instead of trying to mask it. You do what you feel makes you feel better.

It will get easier and i know it will and I'm in the very same position as you right now and I can say that.

If you ever need to talk contact me and I'll be happy to talk.

Be strong
Lauren xx

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