Recovery from surgery after ruptured ectopic- what to expect

[Laurelise13]

Hello all, I’m new here. I had emergency surgery two days ago after my ectopic pregnancy ruptured (when I thought I’d had a miscarriage two weeks ago). I was discharged from the hospital yesterday and now I’m resting at home, and wondering what physical recovery looks like, and especially how long it typically takes to get back to as normal as possible? My doctor recommended taking the next two weeks off of work (my job requires me to be on my feet, barely ever stopping moving for 8 hour shifts) and I’m wondering if I will have to take that much time off.

I’m really just still coming to terms with what happened and trying to figure out what it looks like to come out of this if that makes sense.

I plan to go back to my counselor and start tackling the emotional/psychological stuff as soon as I’m physically able. And that stuff I feel confident in being able to handle because I’ve been in and out of counseling for years and am now a professional counselor, it’s the physical stuff that is so new and difficult for me.

I hope that all makes sense? I’m know that was ramble-y. I am excited to get some support/empathy in this forum as I don’t know anyone personally who’s gone through this.

[Sam4]

Hi. I’m so sorry to hear about what you have all been through, especially considering you thought you had already lost it two weeks earlier. Big hugs.
I suffered my ectopic on 27th Oct last year, ruptured left tube, resulting in surgery with the removal of the tube. I had in total 3 weeks off. I also have a job that means I’m on my feet for 9 hours but I agreed before going back that I needed to rest, so please make sure you do that. I also only work part time, if you are full time I suggest seeing if you can do a phased returned?
The pain for me came mostly when I ovulated or when my period was due, pain that stopped me in my tracks... having read a lot this seems to be “normal” and I think it’s just something we have to learn about our bodies. Only the second week in Jan did I exercise and feel no pain... it’s slow but you’ll get there. I believe you’re doing the right thing talking about it as well, the emotional recovery was harder for me than the physical.
I wish you all the best xx

[EPT Host 22]

Hi Laurelise13,

I am very sorry to hear that you've had to experience an ectopic pregnancy and loss. These boards are full of women and men with this experience, who often did not know of ectopic pregnancy before it happened in their life. It's very good that your GP has recommended the time off. The healing process is so very unique. I can't comment on your specific case, as I'm not medically qualified. The Trust does have some guidance on what to expect after an ectopic pregnancy: https://www.ectopic.org.uk/patients/you ... pregnancy/.

You've been through major surgery. While some things may feel okay, others will take a longer time to heal. As you are familiar with the emotional side, the physical side may seem to heal more quickly. That said, it's important not to over do it. Give your body the time it needs. It's just been through a lot.

We are here for you. As I said, you'll find these boards filled with shared experiences. It's a safe space to ask questions, share, or just vent.

With good wishes,

Michele

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[Mimidubois]

Hello,

I’ve just returned home after 5 days in hospital having my left tube removed after ruptured ectopic pregnancy

I’m concerned about work too. I feel like I may he slightly judged for how long I choose to take off work

A coworker had a hysterectomy after discovering cancer and took a month off. Everyone hears cancer and hysterectomy and knows that’s a big deal and a lot to do through. But I feel having what I’ve had done and so many others here have had done is a little less known and doesn’t sound like maybe it’s that big of a deal.

I work with 4 women who have all had miscarriages but they just all seemed to get on with their job.

So I don’t know what I’m really trying to say. I guess I just feel like people aren’t going to see this as a big deal and if I take more then 3 weeks off work they make think I’m chancing my luck

[EctopicPUL]

After discharge (I had 7 weeks off during expectant management as every other day I was at hospital and at different points had planned surgeries) I had 1 month off.

I did return before before discharge and had a ruptured ovarian cyst on my second day back to work. After that and just the stress of the prior 2 months of constantly feeling in danger, the fact I’d had a unplanned pregnancy and then it’d all gone so so wrong but in this weird long protracted way, I needed that month off. Before that time I was tearful and erratic. You wouldn’t have known it from the outside bc I can put on a good face but the hormones had me spinning and the shock of what had happened only hit me after the physical danger was removed.

After coming back before discharge and only managing the week bc of the cyst, I took a very different path on my 2nd return - a slow phased return back. And it’s worked well.

Do not feel guilty for needing time for your body and mind to heal. I acknowledged that miscarriage may be something that might happen in pregnancy. Ectopic was not even on the page! The shock of the danger and not knowing what I was doing every 48hrs, I had bags packed for surgery (I live alone) and was terrified for 7 weeks of rupturing alone and mine continued to grow for 4 weeks.

Anyway: I didn’t even have surgery and I took time. I counsel people as part of my job. I could not be mentally there for them when I was in shock myself.

I too have a colleague who has cancer and was ‘back at the desk on Tuesday’ throughout chemo and ops. I felt initially in my hormonal state weak and embarrassed that I couldn’t pull up my big girl pants.

Now I don’t at all. I needed that mental healing time. I was in absolute shock (and I didn’t have surgery!). Some people depending on their jobs, find strength in the distraction of resuming their role etc. Others, due to different personalities or roles need more time. We are on the 3rd floor and no lift, for ages I was bleeding (7 weeks) and told to expect a major one - commuting etc didn’t feel right for me. Had I been next door, maybe I could etc.

If you can take anything from my experience is - Remove any comparisons to other colleagues. You don’t know what’s going on for them. I’ve lurked on this board and a miscarriage board for a while and a surprising number of people say I wish I’d taken more time to heal mentally and physically, bc it pops back later on.

Sometimes I needed to hear it’s okay to be off and process the WTF that just happened and to not return to a physical job sore and aching. I worried about judgement too - hey I wasn’t ‘sick’ but my mind needed time. My boss understood but you know, a couple of colleagues I don’t think do understand the phased return - that’s okay. this has been a big life lesson for me - life is short and you don’t need to justify your journey.

Unless you’ve been through this experience you don’t know how horrific it is. Some people find work helps put them back together. I needed to be put back together, to go back to work.

I took a month following discharged, plus phased return for one month for context.

I was also off I think 7 weeks before but during that I had every other day appointments in another city and was bleeding /passing tissue throughout. I had a silly complication of the cyst. However it wasn’t the pain so much that made me need the month off post discharge, it was my head was in shock.

[Frankie1984]

Hi
Whatever you do don’t rush, anyone who would judge the time you want to take is a terrible person!

You need to take whatever time you feel you need, it’s so personal - and you’ve experienced a trauma, you’re allowed to take your time and should.
I took 6 weeks off, i had a ruptured tube and internal bleeding, I had surgery and my left tube removed. within 2 weeks I felt better but I was still taking it slow, only walking for exercise. Your emotions can be all over the place too, and I didn’t want to be back into work until I could feel a bit more like me.
You can also ask to work from home if you’d like to but overall I’d say life is short and give yourself a break- i always worry too much what other people think but right now it’s all about you! Take your time x