Sharing my experience

[LucyB_17]

Hello all,

Ten days ago now I experienced sharp pains in my abdomen and nausea along with diarrhoea and completely blacking out. I was seven weeks pregnant.

Luckily my husband was at home and was there to call an ambulance. When the paramedics came to us, my blood pressure was 66/33. My husband said that they thought that I could be diabetic - it wasn’t until I was in the ambulance and told them about a sharp pain in my shoulder that they suspected what it could be.

On admission in to the hospital, I was greeted with many worried faces. The doctor quickly did a scan, which showed that I had severe internal bleeding. He showed me it and said that my left Fallopian tube had ruptured and would have to be removed along with the embryo. I signed the consent form and said “let’s get on with it” I am so incredibly proud of how strong I was at the time.

I then spent the next three days in intensive care followed by a couple of days in the gynaecology ward.

Then that was it, discharge and get on with your day to day lives. But, how having gone through such trauma can we begin to make sense of what has happened and rebuild our lives again?

I try and build routine in to my life, to eat and sleep well and do one thing that I enjoy each day.

Sometimes I don’t know what to think, sometimes I can feel a huge sadness in my heart. Sometimes I think about the positive stories that I have heard about on ectopic pregnancies and hold on to those glimmers of hope. Sometimes I wonder how I should be feeling about the loss of the baby. We hadn’t formed a huge attachment, as were realistic about what could happen during the early days. But then it is natural, we had begun to wonder whether it would be a boy or a girl, what type of personality it would have and what hair and eye colour.

So that is my experience... a little lost and damaged, wondering about the best way to recover emotionally and physically now and reaching out to others who have gone through something similar.

[lisa_28]

Hi,

I remember all the feelings you describe. When I was having MTX and then surgery I went into strong mode and then as soon as it was all over I was broken. It took me a lot longer to recover emotionally than physically. I had counselling at my local hospital which really helped. I didn’t rush back to work and instead took it slow going out again. I found little steps helped however at times it felt 2 steps forward 3 back. That was almost 3 years ago for me but I still think about my little one. 6 months after my ectopic I was pregnant again third time around (I previously had a miscarriage) I was blessed with a baby girl (the egg even came from me tubeless side). I just wanted to send love and hope xxx

[EPT Host 20]

Dear LucyB_17,
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss,
When we experience ectopic pregnancy we are suddenly faced with a life threatening emergency and it's treatment, reduction in fertility, concerns about the future and the loss of our babies. Experiencing any one of these is an ordeal, putting them together is immense and your feelings are completely normal.

Experiencing an ectopic pregnancy is a huge ordeal and you are in the early stages of recovery. Your body needs time to heal from your surgery which is in itself a gruelling task. You have been through an immense rollercoaster of emotions - all of this will take time to come to terms with.

You should take it very easily for about six weeks after surgery. Your body will be using its energies to heal internally. It is normal to feel physically and emotionally exhausted during this time and please do be kind to yourself. Recovery can take time and some days will be better than others, one day you maybe ok and the next you maybe in discomfort or more emotional. This is perfectly usual and the healing process will go back and forth in this way for however long you need. It is important to listen to your body's signals and pain and feeling tired are your body's signs to tell you to rest. We suggest keeping a healthy balanced diet, drinking lots of water and resting. Once your wounds have healed, very gentle exercise such as a short walk can help, but please do take this slowly.

The forums are a safe place to share our experiences, ask questions, support each other or even vent when we need to. We will all be here for you for as long you need.

Sending much love and warm hugs,
Karen x

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust
Registered Charity Number: 1071811

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