The Neverending Wait Post Op

[zay]

Hi There!

I grew up with 3 sisters all close in age to me. I am 30 years old, active and healthy. I began to worry around the age of 26 when all of my sisters had been pregnant (some a few times) and I had never even had a scare. I think that, along with more painful menstrual cycles prompted me to go to my doctor to investigate a little further. He sent me for an ultrasound, noted some slight inflammation but ensured me it was nothing to worry about.

I had my first miscarriage in November 2017. The pregnancy was a surprise and so it really wasn't a huge upset when I had a miscarriage. The doctor called it a "Suspected Ectopic Pregnancy" which really didn't mean anything to me at that time... I was just happy that I could, in fact, get pregnant.

I met my spouse and got pregnant again in April 2018. Things were still quite new with us and my life was in shambles and I ended up having another muscarriage a month later. I wrote it off as stress and didn't even bother going to the doctor to get checked.

In late December I found out I was pregnant again. My partner and I were now living together and things were a bit more stable aside from a few stresses. We were excited this time to have a baby. We weren't scared and we felt ready. In February 2019 I had another miscarriage. We were devastated.

I had been taking prenatal vitamins. We decided I would continue on the vitamins and we would try again. I was obviously worried there was something wrong with me and me and my partner knew we needed to be ready for anything this time. Well.. I didn't even get my period after the miscarriage in February and I was pregnant again. We were ecstatic and wrote it off as stress again.

I really focused on being extra healthy this time...both physically AND mentally. Still, sonething was wrong. It first started as light spotting and mild pain in the beginning of March. Spotting turned to bleeding, mild turned to severe. I was on google like crazy but still, every pregnancy test was very positive. So I googled some more. For every reason to think there was something wrong I could also find an artucle telling me it's fine and that everybody experiences pregnancy differently. I figured this was my version of pregnancy. I painted a smile on each day, tried to stay optimistic for my partner (and myself).

One day I just couldn't stand it anymore. I couldn't bare the pain and I especially couldn't bare the thought of going on like that for several more months. I told my partner, we called TeleHealth and they instructed him to take me to the hospital immediately and call an ambulance if I lose consciousness. So off to the hospital we went.

We arrived at 1pm, I was admitted immediately, given an ultrasound and they informed me of blood in my pelvis and that I was having an ectopic pregnancy. I was rushed to surgery by 7pm and woke up in recovery around 9pm. They informed me that my fallopian tube had already burst likely before I even got there and that they removed it. They also noted inflammation in my pelvis and I will need to follow up for further instructions in 6 weeks.

6 week Followup went well. I healed fine and have been reffered for a Sonohistogram to investigate my inflammation. The doctor put me on the strongest birth control she knew of because she's almost certain if I get pregnant I will have an ectopic in my only remaining tube. She says I am a good candidate for IVF but she wants to do some tests before she refers me so we can get to the bottom of things.

All of the healthcare professionals I have dealt with have been wonderful throughout all this... I just feel like a lost a huge piece of my womanhood. My periods have been so ireggular and now have fibally stabilized enough to get my sonohistogram done...4 months post op. The sonohistogram requires an ultrasound from a day or 2 prior.

I had that ultrasound today and I've felt overwhelmed with sadness ever since. The day after tomorrow is the sono. I feel happy to hopefully be getting some answers... But I just feel sad about the situation today.

Does anyone have any similar issues?

Thanks for listening,
Zay

[EPT Host 20]

Dear Zay,
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and losses. To experience one loss is difficult, to deal with multiple losses is heartbreaking and my heart truly goes out to you.
When we experience ectopic pregnancy we are suddenly faced with a life threatening emergency and it's treatment, reduction in fertility, concerns about the future and the loss of our babies. Experiencing any one of these is an ordeal, putting them together is immense and your feelings are completely normal.
Many women experience feelings of isolation after an ectopic pregnancy - I did, too. It is a frightening experience. Like you, I reached out to the Trust for support and we will be here for you to lean on for as long as you need.
I will be thinking of you for your investigations and I hope you get some answers.
Sending much love and warm hugs,
Karen x

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust
Registered Charity Number: 1071811

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