Feeling lost 4 weeks after surgery

[Lia]

Hi I’m 4 weeks post surgery, I didn’t know I was pregnant (but wanted to be) all of a sudden became unwell, collapsed and ended up in an ambulance to a&e, didn’t know what was wrong to have blood tests to be told I was pregnant and was ectopic, had 2 litres of internal bleeding to being rushed to theatre, pregnancy and right tube removed. Following days all seem a bit of a blur with strong pain killers etc. I just feel a bit lost and don’t know how I feel, I’ve cried, I’ve felt ok. I feel I would like to discuss what actually happened but hospital said consultant didn’t request a follow up appointment.... anyone else been in this situation? Don’t really fully understand everything and wants to know more ?

[Danic84]

Im 6 weeks post surgery and I feel the same. I have moments where i feel ok but then i just break. Im suffering with bad infections where my belly button wound is and thats getting me down as i dont seem to be getting any better.
*gentle hugs* your not alone in this journey

[Lia]

Thanks for ur reply @Danic84
Hopefully your wound will heal soon, antibiotics and plenty of rest will help, if your anything like me you may be fed up resting.

It’s strange when you don’t know what to feel, I feel like I keep looking for something and I don’t know what, that doesn’t even make sense

[Danic84]

Thanks.
I was the same but my mum got me a little bear i could cuddle as a way to help and it has helped me abit. When im feeling really low i just cuddle my bear until i start to feel abit better. Maybe something like that could help?

[EPT Host 20]

Dear Lia,
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss,
Experiencing an ectopic pregnancy is a huge ordeal and you are in the early stages of recovery. Your body needs time to heal from your surgery which is in itself a gruelling task. You have also had to process the loss of your baby and been through an immense rollercoaster of emotions - all of this will take time to come to terms with.

You should take it very easily for about six weeks after surgery. Your body will be using its energies to heal internally. It is normal to feel physically and emotionally exhausted during this time and please do be kind to yourself. Recovery can take time and some days will be better than others, one day you maybe ok and the next you maybe in discomfort or more emotional. This is perfectly usual and the healing process will go back and forth in this way for however long you need. It is important to listen to your body's signals and pain and feeling tired are your body's signs to tell you to rest. We suggest keeping a healthy balanced diet, drinking lots of water and resting. Once your wounds have healed, very gentle exercise such as a short walk can help, but please do take this slowly.

If you have unanswered questions, and wish to have a follow up with your consultant, but do not have an appointment, I would advise speaking to your GP who maybe able to refer you back to have an appointment or speaking to the Patient Advice Liaison Service (PALS) in your local hospital directly who maybe able to answer questions from your medical notes or make the appointment for you.

Many women experience feelings of isolation after an ectopic pregnancy - I did, too. It is a frightening experience. Like you, I reached out to the Trust for support and we will be here for you to lean on for as long as you need.

Sending much love and warm hugs,
Karen x

The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust
Registered Charity Number: 1071811

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[cka]

Hi @Lia,

I am really sorry you are going through this, it is all such a shock and so much to process.

It will be 4 weeks since my surgery tomorrow and I am finding things really tough. I am very up and down, very tearful one day and brighter the next.

Like you, there was no follow up. The surgeon just came to see me when I was in recovery and quite out of it, just remember her saying that it was long (tube or ectopic i don't know) and that the other tube looked OK.

I have made myself a follow up with the GP to talk about things, how I am healing and if there was any further detail they were sent from my discharge notes. Don't know if this might be helpful?

I am finding my recovery has slowed this week, my back is very sore and still can't walk far or fast which is tough and will need another week off - definitely fed up of being at home like you mentioned.

Just wanted to reach out as I am in a similar situation. Good to hear from people going through the same.

[Lia]

Thanks.
I was the same but my mum got me a little bear i could cuddle as a way to help and it has helped me abit. When im feeling really low i just cuddle my bear until i start to feel abit better. Maybe something like that could help?

Hi @Danic84
Just wondering how your recovery is going? Are you feeling any better

[Danic84]

Hiya, one of my infected wounds seems to be finally healing but the other hasn't changed yet. I feel abit more alert but i seem to be so clumsy and then loose my temper easily.. Hope its not long term.
How are you

[Lia]

@Danic84
I’m ok starting to walk a bit more, still get really tired. I’ve been getting dull pain in my right side every now and again and it scares me a little, but wondering if it’s scar tissue. I get so anxious about internal healing.

[Danic84]

Yeah I've noticed that pain too and it feels like its quite tight too. It feels so different to my c section scars which is odd. The nurses on the ward i was on told me that some of the pain etc is because the procedure isnt gentle like some operations..

[Lia]

That’s what it feels tight, I’ve had 2 previous sections too, what bout u? What pregnancy number is this for u x

[Danic84]

Had first section 12 years ago with my daughter, then had my little boy 2 years ago.. This was number 3 but had no idea I was pregnant ( was very much wanted) but all pregnancy tests were negative and i still had my period but it only shown in a blood test and i was 7 weeks along so .. Still would love another when I'm ready but worried it will happen again

[Lia]

Exact same as me I didn’t know either and had wanted to be, also had negative test and normal period. I’m so scared to try again as that was the 4th time I’ve been opened in same place, also had previous surgeries for ovarian cyst removal and I just don’t know if my body could take any more

[Danic84]

Oh i hope you do, after what we have all been through we are all due abit of luck