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Lost hope
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- Posts: 5
- Joined: Wed Apr 15, 2020 10:48 pm
Lost hope
I had an ectopic pregnancy in April 2020, unfortunately it was undetected and my right tube ruptured at home. I went for emergency surgery and lost my right Fallopian tube. Since June my fiancé and I have been trying for a baby and it’s negative after negative after negative test. It’s absolutely heartbreaking. I fell pregnant very quickly with my ectopic, but am really struggling to conceive now. I’ve tried ovulation tests, taking supplements and just feel so frustrated.
I also ended up having a 6cm cyst on my right ovary and a small cyst on my left which I am having another scan for next week. It just honestly feels like one thing after another. Being nearly 25 and otherwise fit and healthy I just feel so deflated and can’t help but blame myself for not being able to get pregnant again. Part of me feels like it’s never going to happen for me and that I’m letting my partner down.
If anyone can give me any advice or positive stories I would be completely and utterly grateful xx
Re: Lost hope
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- Posts: 5
- Joined: Wed Apr 15, 2020 10:48 pm
Re: Lost hope
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- Posts: 3176
- Joined: Thu May 31, 2012 10:58 pm
Re: Lost hope
I am so sorry to hear of your ectopic pregnancy and loss,
I very much understand that strong desire to conceive. I appreciate how frustrating it can be if it isn't happening as quickly as we would like. Conceiving successfully can take time and can take some couples more than a year or so.
While generally it is possible to conceive after an ectopic pregnancy, the amount of time it takes varies from couple to couple. Factors include age, general health, reproductive health and how often you have sex, among other things. It may be comforting to know that 65% of women are successfully pregnant within 18 months of experiencing an ectopic pregnancy and some studies suggest this rises to around 85% after two years.
In addition. having regular sex means having sex every 2/3 days throughout the month. Guidance from the UK's National Institute of Health and Clinical Excellence advises that having sex around the time when the woman ovulates causes stress and is not recommended. We here at the EPT suggest having intercourse 2/3 times between days 10-20 of their cycle when trying to conceive. We also have information on our website on trying to conceive here:
https://ectopic.org.uk/patients/trying-to-conceive/
I know that when I had my ectopic pregnancy I also looked for a reason and almost automatically we tend to blame ourselves. From the bottom of my heart, there is nothing you could have done to prevent the ectopic pregnancy from happening. I cannot emphasise enough - you are not to blame. Please be kind to yourself and I send you gentle hugs. x
Karen x
The Ectopic Pregnancy Trust
Registered Charity Number: 1071811
Ectopic pregnancy patient information suite: Highly Commended in the 2019 BMA Patient Information Awards
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Further information is available at ectopic.org.uk
Email us: ept@ectopic.org.uk
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