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I still can’t believe this happened
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- Joined: Mon Jun 25, 2018 4:31 pm
I still can’t believe this happened
So, on the 8th of June I visited my doctors after having a positive pregnancy test and heavy bleeding, after an examination - she said she suspected I had had a miscarriage.
A week later, I decided to take another test as I still had symptoms of pregnancy (nausea, sore boobs, etc) but was still bleeding heavily. Another positive result. So I went to the doctors again where I was referred to the early pregnancy support unit. They took bloods which showed HCG levels of 300, these were then repeated two days later and showed 310 - showing that there was a high chance I was having an ectopic pregnancy. I was asked to come in two days later unless I felt pain or anything out of the ordinary.
However, the next day (day 28 of continuous bleeding), I began to feel uncomfortable so was whipped into the hospital and before I knew it, had consented and been prepped for surgery as a mass had been found in my right Fallopian tube with free fluid in POD.
Due to adhesions around my left Fallopian tube and my body looking slightly damaged from PID - they chose to save both my tubes.
4 days post op and I’m unsure if I’m using painkillers for the pains or to dull the emotions. My partner had to shower me and dress me earlier although I’m sure I could have physically managed, I just didn’t want to.
I did not plan to become pregnant but that did not mean it was an unwanted pregnancy. This is all a little harder today than it seemed to be yesterday.
I have no questions and no aim for this post, I just am not sure where to discuss. I have no friends who understand, my partner is I’m sure fed up of the rollercoaster of emotions and I feel the need to show a brave exterior to my family.
I’m so sorry for all of you who have been through this or are going through this and I hope tomorrow is better for us all
Re: I still can’t believe this happened
The grief is real. Don’t try to put on a brave face for your family, let it out, grieve. I went through so many emotions with both ectopics... sadness, grief, ANGER, confusion, uncertainty. It doesn’t help that you’re hormones are probably all out of whack right now too! But it does ease up. It will take several weeks, but the raw painful emotions will scab over. You’ll still fill them off and on... little things will trigger it, but it will get better. *hugs*
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